The land of the treesitters.
Good ol’ Cali-forn-eye-ay.
The land where we stand up for, or sit down for, what we believe in, even if it means living among the ticks and going showerless for a month.
Of course, normal folks can’t afford to live there, but damn it, there will be trees, and old ones too! Miles of virgin forests for the rich people and the starving hippies to enjoy!
Don’t get me wrong, I’m a tree-hugger. When I lived in Santa Cruz, I cried right along with everyone else when I found out that the magnificent old Walnut across the street from my work had been cut down because the Mercedes owner who regularly parked under it was tired of scraping the bird crap off his windshield.
I’ve become attached to all manner of trees because they were on the property where I lived and I’d spent many hours gazing lovingly at their leaves waving in the wind.
If I am ever fortunate enough to own a piece of land, I’d like to have all kinds of trees, depending on the climate: if it was warm enough, I’d love to have orange trees, avocados, peaches, maybe a kiwi. If it was a colder climate, I’d love to have apple trees, a pine grove, hopefully a redwood.
And should someone decide, for a really dumb cosmetic reason, to cut down an awesome tree that lives on public property in my community, I might even show up to protest. I’d of course have to go home to my own bed and toilet at night, thank you very much, but I could lend my voice to the cause. I’m very supportive of trees.
I can’t help it. It’s in my Californian blood.
And it’s a fun place to be from, you know, people think you’re a nutjob so you get to be little on the funky side of normal. You get to say “Dude” as much as you like. You get to make a big stink about things that most people don’t even think twice about, like trimming hedges. Cuz the hedges have integrity, you know, and it is not within our earthly mandate to limit their personal growth.
And if I forget to take a shower on any given day, Hey! I was up a tree, saving it’s life! Give a gal a break, man!
And could you remove the ticks from the back of my neck, when you get a chance?
We may not be the original environmentalists, but we’ve taken the discipline about as far as it’ll go, baby!